Practicing love

We are pausing our therapeutic relationship with T-1.

This is scary. T-1 has been one of our strongest tethers. Will we ever see each other again? If not, thank you for trying to help us. We learned many lessons.

T-2 will know this week if T-2 can begin seeing us in person in some capacity.

T-3 sees us once per week. We asked for more sessions per week, and the answer was no.

We may seek a new T to help with OCD. We are having delusions, perfectionism, scarcity obsessions. We get stuck in loops. The T-1 situation is the plot line right now, but even when we were seeing T-1, we were obsessed that our therapeutic relationship would end.

So our thinking is the threat, not any situation.

Wet are scared of ERP therapy because the exposures feel like violence. We wish there was Compassion Therapy for OCD.

Was pausing T-1 therapy in our best interests? We may never know. We are trying it. And it is so painful we feel like we might never stop suffering.

We obsess over it. As we obsess over so much. We must help ourselves. We are rapid cycling, meaning switching a lot. Many me’s have opinions about leaving T-1. They all matter. We all need love from inside us.

We must teach each other on the inside that everyone acts based on meeting their needs. The intention is always to help meet a need. If we listen to each other and try to meet as many needs as we can with an action, then we will suffer less.

So please practice cooperation.

It is so hard to feel love

It is so hard to feel safe

Fear is so easy

Everything we want, if it is going to be attained, is going to be attained through practice.

We can practice love

We can practice self-compassion