Practicing love

We are pausing our therapeutic relationship with T-1.

This is scary. T-1 has been one of our strongest tethers. Will we ever see each other again? If not, thank you for trying to help us. We learned many lessons.

T-2 will know this week if T-2 can begin seeing us in person in some capacity.

T-3 sees us once per week. We asked for more sessions per week, and the answer was no.

We may seek a new T to help with OCD. We are having delusions, perfectionism, scarcity obsessions. We get stuck in loops. The T-1 situation is the plot line right now, but even when we were seeing T-1, we were obsessed that our therapeutic relationship would end.

So our thinking is the threat, not any situation.

Wet are scared of ERP therapy because the exposures feel like violence. We wish there was Compassion Therapy for OCD.

Was pausing T-1 therapy in our best interests? We may never know. We are trying it. And it is so painful we feel like we might never stop suffering.

We obsess over it. As we obsess over so much. We must help ourselves. We are rapid cycling, meaning switching a lot. Many me’s have opinions about leaving T-1. They all matter. We all need love from inside us.

We must teach each other on the inside that everyone acts based on meeting their needs. The intention is always to help meet a need. If we listen to each other and try to meet as many needs as we can with an action, then we will suffer less.

So please practice cooperation.

It is so hard to feel love

It is so hard to feel safe

Fear is so easy

Everything we want, if it is going to be attained, is going to be attained through practice.

We can practice love

We can practice self-compassion

15 thoughts on “Practicing love

      1. Personally while I don’t have OCD, my friends, I vastly prefer ACT to CBT. And my therapist is trained in ACT for trauma and it blends well with mindfulness parts of DBT and our schema therapy.

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  1. I’m sad T1 does not want to increase sessions, some really find that helpful… therapy ought not to be very rigid but perhaps that is my protectiveness flaring… I trust all of yous are trying to meet needs

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      1. Hugs. More hurt, in my opinion, is inevitable during the course of life. Hopefully not traumatic hurt but that cannot be guaranteed. However I hope still that there will be love and care and support and community and heading, and that will bring resilience when future hurts happen ❤❤

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    1. Thanks for caring. For us, we usually need to practice skills when we are calm or resourced. Those are rare conditions these days. So we might have to rely on what we’ve already got in us

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      1. “Resourced” is a good word. Calm and resourced. It’s true — we need to practice our coping skills when we are in a calm state, so that we can tap into them more naturally when we are in some form of crisis. Thanks for the food for thought, and I really hope the internal chaos eases soon xo

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