Medication withdrawal

Bodily functions warning ⚠️

Have been tapering down Xanax for more than a month. Stepped down to zero last night.

This was not the plan. We were having withdrawal symptoms already. We needed several more days at current dosage.

We didn’t crave it as much and thought we’d just get it over with. Slept very poorly, deliriously. Purple cacti all over the ceiling and T-1 among them. Help us, T-1!

Woke up with painful bloating and diarrhea. Made the decision to take small dose of Xanax, diarrhea meds, and zofran this morning. We were worried we would vomit from the nausea. We dehydrate pretty easily. This is not an ideal time to visit the ER with COVID still rampant here.

We hydrated after sleeping more, and tummy has settled down somewhat. Ate some easy-to-digest food.

Was obsessive a lot today. Dozed most of the day. Now we’re waking up—just in time to medicate and try to sleep.

We will take a small dose of Xanax again tonight. We will consider trying to further break the pills for more even more tapering starting tomorrow.

This is a challenging process, switching meds. The new meds make us tired yet still interfere with sleep.

We see the psychiatrist on Tuesday. We can survive until then. It’s just that mental health therapy is not helping much anymore. Meeting in cars is not getting the job done. Trying to start a new relationship with T-5 is more draining than affirming. Costs forks.

We don’t want to seem ungrateful. T-3 and T-2 meet is in cars because they care. It’s just not enough right now. We started looking at PHP/IOP programs nearby. We are tired.